I just want to type that out loud. And make you look at it:
I’m fairly certain that what we have here are, left-to-right: the chocolate chip pancake flavor, regular ol’ cake- cake, and blueberry pancake flavors (Jon Stewart’s choice).
More disturbing than something that’s at least reminiscent of the harmless corndog, there’s this new product offering ol’ Jimmy Dean is thowing down. Check it out:
Ok, D-light Breakfast Bowl Producers: I just want to know…is there anything easier to make than eggs? Even with crap tossed into the mix? Come, on Jimmy Dean. I think most children could muster this more days of the week than not. In fact, I’d have to check with Moms, but scrambled eggs may have been the first dish I learned to cook (that involved heat).
Also: this product design doesn’t have nearly the magic that must have been required to produce the pancake-wrappery above.
I’m left wanting.
However I will say this for them: despite making an utterly questionable product that is super easy to make oneself, and leaving out of it the juicy joys of both yolk and full fat cheese, at least it’s got half the calories! Of the product leader in this lazy-ass, utterly questionable market! And only 30% of the calories of this product are fat. Yays.
This brings to mind a story told to me by my friend Vito, back in January. I wrote it down on a bar napkin:
‘this is the best kind of Vito Story:
“You just reminded me…there was this burger I had in Atlanta….
The burger, called the Triple Bypass, had…3 patties…3 fried eggs… bacon…cheese and instead of buns, 2 grilled cheese sandwiches.”
I miss you, Vito. And I will commence looking for photographic evidence of this mythic item.